In my day it was J.T.T.

Back in college we had a saying, "When life hands you lemons, smoke them out of a hookah." So when my neighbor gifted me a chihuahua calendar, an impossible match for the current decor, I knew I had to find a way to turn this situation into something better. And as I flipped through adorable pup after adorable pup I realized something. Maybe this gift wasn't for me at all. Maybe the only one who can truly appreciate it is Natalie.

So we picked out the finest stud in the whole calendar & hung it up right over her bed. Just like I used to do with Teen Beat cut outs of Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Like mother like pupster.

In Case of Fire

(source)

Sometimes as bloggers we all have moments where we read something adorable and say "aw I really like that... I'm totally gonna steal it!" And that's exactly what happened reading Amanda's blog today. But it's ok, I told her I'm hijacking her post like the brazen blogger than I am.

Her post was all about "If I had to suddenly leave because of a fire (because that was actually a possibility for her at the time... yikes!) what would I save?" Not being at risk of burning takes away a bit of the drama, but it's still good food for thought. Stuff can be replaced, but what would I be devastated to lose?

#1) This little lady would be the first thing I stuff under an arm, no question.

#2) My photo albums. I might be in the last generation who would list this, but until my senior year of college there was no facebook to house all these memories, so I have 21 years of my life & friendships stored the old fashioned way. I would be so heartbroken if I lost them all.

#3) Probably my computer. It's another portal where memories are housed, not to mention my portfolio & any evidence I've been a professional for a half-decade.

(source: We Heart It)

#4) Ok I know this is totally replaceable, but while I'm already throwing readily available thing in a backpack I'd probably toss in my box set of Sex & The City as well. Don't judge me...

An Urban Oasis

I have a dream to someday own a townhouse in the city, 3 stories high, brightly painted, coordinating shutters, pocket doors, & a rooftop deck where I can drink in the middle of the day & have a vegetable garden.

I'm currently pretty far from that dream, but I'm in training.

See when I first moved into my apartment, the previous tenants & friends of mine had to make one promise to me... that they wouldn't begrudge me when their whole garden died. I have the furthest thing from a green thumb & the garden I inherited was planted by Mother Nature herself. Seriously when I moved in all the neighbors stopped over to say hi & to make sure I was going to keep the garden, it's like a community landmark. So it's time that this girl learns a thing or 2 about working with the earth.

Here's what I've learned so far from my training...

1. Things that have spikes, grow from under the sidewalk, & strangle other plants are definitely weeds.
2. Bushes need no assistance. I like bushes. We're friends.
3. A few accessories in bright colors go a long way.
4. Even a so-so garden from a very inexperienced gardener turns brick into a little oasis.

And for the first time EVER... I have a fresh bouquet from my garden!

So I'm figuring it out. And someday when I have that dream house I won't have to start from scratch because I'll have all these years of gardening experience. Next year: Mission Veggies.

Hey green-thumbed friends, any words of wisdom?

Top 5 Sparks

 (source: We Heart It)

I've been officially blogging for a year & a half now, can you believe it? After a while you loose track of what used to be mile-markers or looking for any kind of round number to celebrate. It seems silly in the same kind of way you roll your eyes at couples who celebrate 4 month anniversaries. But on this nominally momentous occasion, how would you like to take a little trip down memory lane with me?

Ladies & Gentlemen (who am I kidding? Ladies & more ladies....) I present to you: the top 5 posts in Sparky history for your perusing pleasure...

#5 - C25K

The story of how Tink & I went from couch potatoes to 5k finishers. I can't remember another time in my life when I felt so proud of any accomplishment. It makes me remember what it felt like to love running.

#4 - Flashback Friday, Week 4

A love story for the ages: 3 best friends & a Valentine's tradition to remember.

#3 - Vlogging & Karaoke

You'll notice a trend with the top 3, they all involve being Germanic or embarrassing myself (apparently they're real crowd pleasers!) This one happens to be a combo. Who knew I had such skill to be absurd AND German at the same time?

#2 - Fastnachts Day

I don't blame you guys one bit for making this a favorite. Fatty balls of deep-fried delish... who can resist? Go ahead & get your Pennsylvania Dutch on while you give this one another look. Although I swear I just gained 3 lbs. from reading.

#1 - Please Vote

This post rose to infamy when my pup was in the running for a cutest baby contest. I'm sure it's still burned in most of your memories for better or worse. Voting became a fierce rivalry & this post was the launching pad to the polls. But all's well that ends well... aka my dog totally kicked those toddlers' asses.

Did I miss any other favorites over the past 18 months? Don't leave me out here on Memory Lane all by myself, I'd love to hear the posts you love the best. I think the period mix will be going down in history as a personal favorite. haha 

Thanks for all the comments typed & friendships made over this year & a half... I don't have the most readers in the world but I'm fairly certain I have the best. Much love to you ALL.

The View From Where I Sit

 (source: We Heart It)

A few months ago I did a little play-along post about my office & the things in it. Nothing profound, just a goofy light-hearted post. Well I realized it's out of date because I'm in a NEW job with a NEW office & a totally NEW VIEW! Want a little tour?

This is Fritzwilliam, my work-husband.He's classy.

I like to surround myself with smiling faces & family portraits.

(left to right: Seder '10, Sam's wedding/F-unit, Mexico '09)

(left to right: Murder Mystery '10, Patches & Natalie)

And an old classic. It just wouldn't be my desk without these...

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to ask how the new job is going & show you care. I appreciate the support through what's been a really great transition. The job is going good & I'm actually VERY well suited for the position I'm in, which is really refreshing. I'm still not 100% acclimated to being a 9-5er, it feels like my whole day is over by the time I get home, but I'm pretty sure I'll learn to adjust any day now.

Funnyface Friday

Funnyface Friday? I don't know, I'm feeling like a goofball today. This will not likely be a regular Friday theme, I like flashing back too much. Maybe it's butterflies from the Murder Mystery I'm in tonight, maybe it's because my kids brought me cookies at 8am, but I just want to push a bit of silliness your way. As if "the worlds hardest game" yesterday wasn't enough.

FunnyFace #1-

Alternate Title: How NOT to take jumping photos

(this is my first try uploading a gif

if it doesn't move, click on it)

As it turns out it's way harder than it looks to get a jumping shot at just the right time. But my mind works in probably a similar way as many of you bloggers that as soon as I've got news to share, I get an imagine in mind that I MUST have. So if at first you don't succeed, try try try try try again.

FunnyFace #2-

Alternate Title: Channeling Delta Burke.

That gigantic head of hair is the aftermath of our dress rehearsal for the Murder Mystery. Strangely it looks about the same height as when I had it pinned up. My goal was to look was to look like I belonged on the set of Dynasty or Designing Women. I think mission accomplished.

So those are my funny faces for today. Have any you'd like to share with me?

Happy Friday!

The World's Hardest Games

(source: WeHeartIt)

This has been my last week EVER as a teacher. Wooo! So what am I using my fleeting time for? Instilling life lessons to guide young minds?  

NOPE.

We're playing games. When I'm gone they'll get split up into other classes anyway, so I haven't taught a real lesson all week. Strangely (or maybe not so strangely) my little hellions act like perfect angels when there's no work to be done. So even though they're enjoying this way more than vocab lessons or research papers, I'm enjoying their attitude way more too. It's a win-win.

For my 12th graders we had the most grueling 4-day game of Monoply you've ever seen. Deals were made, hearts were broken, smack-talk was had, & in the end I bankrupted EVERY ONE OF THEM. (insert evil laugh here) And it felt GOOD. You don't mess with Miss Wolcott.

(true story: At one point I landed on free-parking which was stacked with money by that point in the game. I was so excited & my students were so angry that I ended up throwing the bills in the air & yelling "Woooo! Make it rain! What now?!")

For my 9th graders they were just given free periods, but we all ended up with a severe addiction to "The World's Hardest Game". That's literally it's name & I swear it's true. I cannot get past level 1 yet. It may not look like much but proceed with caution, I don't want to be responsible when you're sleep-deprived & unemployed because you can't take your eyes off the screen. But let me know how far you get, seriously. The best I've seen so far is level 12.

www.worldshardestgame.org

A Few Treats

This is what happens when you piss off the universe by going against nature & gushing about actually enjoying Monday mornings... the universe retaliates. Just for a little example: I tried to replicate my "get up & cook for the day" routine this morning, but only succeeded in setting off my smoke detector at 7am. (much to the chagrin of everyone else in my building I'm sure... go back to bed, you're not going to die) And a picture frame just fell on my head as I was typing. I could really use a little treat, how about you?

Treat #1 - Morning Love

Emma sent me the playlist of that morning mix she made for me. I'm telling you it really is perfect, so if you want to have your own wake-up cd filled with songs chosen for just such a time, feel free follow Emma's list:

1. Be (intro) - Common
2. Where is my mind? - the pixies
3. maps - yeah yeah yeahs
4. float on - modest mouse
5. hola hovito - Jay-Z
6. 4 page letter - aaliyah
7. *home - Edward Sharpe and the magnetic zeros
8. the only living boy in New York - Simon & Garfunkel
9. the zephyr song - RHCP
10. Be OK (acoustic) - Ingrid Michaelson
11. *Good Morning (intro) - Kanye West
12. All you ever wanted - The Black Keys
13. The district sleeps alone tonight - The Postal Service
14. Buildings and Bridges - Ani Difranco
15. Learning to Fly - Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
16. Happiness is a Warm Gun - The Beatles
17. *We Know - Talib Kweli & Faith Evans (this was her wedding recessional)
18. Say it Ain't So - Weezer
19. New Slang - The Shins
20. He Woke Me Up - Sufjan Stevens
21. *Dog Days are Over - Florence and the Machine

 * My current favorites

Treat #2 - Off-Season Love

If you know me at all you had to have known I'd share this on my blog.
Hines Ward on Dancing with the Stars!!

No joke, yesterday I bribed my students to behave with this video.

Also speaking of my Steelers in the off-season spotlight... I was reading an interview with Matthew Morrison (Mr. Shue from Glee & celebrity crush that gives me tingles), & here's how he responded to a question about whether or not he watches trash TV:

Honestly, I come home and watch ESPN. I’m a big Mets fan, I love the Steelers -- but I grew up playing soccer, so I love watching soccer matches.

I just fell even deeper into fictional-love.

Treat #3 - Redeemed Omelet

I'm about to drop a little knowledge on you. Even if you have a ridiculously failed morning like mine, it can always be redeemed... turns out you can microwave eggs into an omelet.

Everyone Loves Zombies

So remember this stupid February-funk that's got me feeling like a zombie?

• Yesterday the only thing that got me off the couch was I promised friends a ride to a party
• I ditched them with someone else to leave that party early
• I didn't want to get out of bed today until my dog PAWED my FACE to wake me up for yoga
• I wore my t-shirt backwards to yoga class

BUT... on the plus side.. people love zombies! Right?

Glee's zombie "Thriller" mash-up with the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Zombie Me.com

Make Me Zombie.com

So what's the moral to this zombie story? Have fun with it. And have good friends that force you out of your house anyway. Tonight I've got a dinner date with a fabulous old friend & a tiny little boy who's still cooking in the oven... the perfect remedy to put a little life back in you.

Tree-Huggers Delight

This is a guest post from your favorite hippie & mine, B-Stew. She asked me well before the holidays if she could write a post on my blog about her eco-friendly travel experience, & even though being one with nature doesn't exactly sparky my fire, it sure does for her! Little did I know I'd get to google search photo after photo of shirtless Brad Pitt... SOLD. So without further adieu...
_____________________________________________

No, I'm not going to use my guest blogging opportunity talk about Fight Club (and my recent obsession with Edward Norton...yes, I realize I'm 12 years behind). As Norton's character points out, flights are filled with single servings, from the single serving friend sitting beside you to the single serving bag of 16 pretzels. Every six hours, in the US alone, 1 million disposable, one-time use, single-serving cups are distributed.

Every 6 hours.

For a bit of a backstory, I moved from Pittsburgh to Washington (the state, not D.C.) to get a masters in environmental education. For one of my classes, we had to conduct a behavior change project--on ourselves. I decided that, for one week, I would not purchase or use single-serving packaging--no paper Starbucks coffee cup, no granola bar, no single-serving bottle beverage, no take-out or fast food, etc. etc. I made my own granola bars; I carried my coffee mug everywhere; I made sure I had enough snacks in reusable containers that I wouldn't have to buy the pre-wrapped goodies at the deli. I made it through the challenge, which brought to light how much packaging we consume daily. Especially the single-serving kind. After the project, I still tried to reduce the amount of single-serving packaging I consumed. And, I try to vote with my dollar as much as possible, and buy things with the least amount of packaging or the most packaging that can be reused/recycled/composted.

My next challenge: I would fly from Seattle to Pittsburgh without using single servings. The added challenges: carry-on restrictions, 11 hours of travel time, and not eating in the airports due to packaging/costs of sit-down restaurants/being a vegetarian.

So what did I end up taking?

• 6 bananas
• graham crackers
• pretzels
• trail mix
• raisins
• carob chips
• carrots

A few things I was worried about not making it through security: almond butter and celery, a container of almond butter, and an avocado. But, luckily, everything went through splendidly. And, yes, most of my backpack was food, crowded around my laptop...

The single serving friends that were sitting beside me during the flights might have thought t it was strange that I politely declined the teensy bag of pretzels and beverage from the flight attendant, while attempting to cut an avocado with a spork and drinking from a water bottle. But maybe, even though I didn't discuss single servings with anyone, it sparked a thought on the one-time-use nature of travel and the little things an individual can do to reduce their consumption and their impact on this world that we love to travel, see, and experience.

Insightful-net

(source: we heart it)

I'm sure some of you are feeling the same way I am this evening: less than thrilled with the prospect of a new work week. Especially one after a long holiday break. The work will be piled up, the emails will be overflowing, the kids will be hellions (ok that one is pretty me-specific). It can be overwhelming just to think about.

I had a low point while mulling this over... the hoovering gloom of tomorrow persuaded me to type the following into Google: "What should I do with my life?" You know you're in trouble when you're expecting Google to answer this for you, especially when looking for an answer to take hold in time for work tomorrow. I even got cocky with it & pressed "I'm feeling lucky" instead of the normal search button. And to my pleasant surprise, my old buddy didn't let me down.

Somedays I think no one will know me as well as my computer.
(Insert obvious Big Brother-esque reply here. I know.)

The page it brought me to was an article that basically directed the reader back to themselves. Continue in self-discovery & let that guide you to close the gap between who you are & what you do. Good advice, Google, I knew I could count on you!

This is every bit as insightful as that other friend of mine... Netflix. You know how they use your ratings to suggest categories you'll like? They know me better than I know myself. You're right Netflix, I DO like feel-good comedies featuring strong female leads! And critically acclaimed, witty documentaries! You can't get much more specific than that. So thanks my digital companions, without you I'd have to find some other hobby to suck all my time & keep me calm on nights like these.

Now if only I could get FaceBook ads to stop telling me what kind of guys to meet...

Please Vote

Please? Pretty pretty please with a dog biscuit on top?

Voting has opened for the "Work It Wednesday" contest over at WCMCNW? & although I think Natalie is a dead-ringer, I know there are still some people out there who actually prefer children to adorable pup-faced angels like my Natalie. Hard to believe, I know.

All you have to do is GO HERE & Vote Natalie.

Can you honestly resist this face?

The View From MY Desk

I was feeling a little short on time & energy today... B-Stew is in town which is awesome but means I don't go to bed on time or make her wait while I work on a brilliant blog post. (because I have so many of those anyway... ) And just like that, Alyssa comes to the rescue with a quick, fun idea. "If you were sitting at my desk right now you would see" Thanks girl!

So... If YOU were sitting at MY desk right now, you would see:

The people (& substances) that fuel me

My to-do list

Reminders of what really matters.

A little bit of fun. :)
It's homecoming week at the school I work for & today's
"spirit day" is sports jerseys. SPURS REPRESENT!

So as Alyssa asked, let me repeat...
"Show me what I'd see if I were sitting where you are!"

Work It Wednesday

Check out Natalie's "Work It Wednesday" entry!!! Sure this contest is supposed to be for children... don't judge me. hehe In another week the VOTING will start & I really hope to have all your support for my classy little lady.

Go over to Wife, Check. Mom, Check. Now What? to see Natalie's full entry & her competition. (dang it's hard to compete with babies!)

"Pictured at home in her posh, vintage-inspired Pittsburgh apartment, Natalie is the epitome of Old-Hollywood elegance. For this rare glimpse into her personal life..."

You'll have to head to WCMCNW? to see her full write up. Yes, I made it in the form of an IMDb profile... again I say, don't judge me.

Dear Secret Pal:

Dear Secret Pal,
I owe you an apology, whoever you are. I'm sorry that I called you a deadbeat, I judged you too quickly and far too harshly. You're not a deadbeat at all. Thank you very much for my fair-trade coffee beans, I'm sure you went well over the dollar amount encouraged & I appreciate your thoughtfulness. And an extra big thank you for those gourmet dog treats... Natalie LOVES them.. & I love you for not judging me for spoiling my dog rotten.

I feel like I need some way to balance my karma after being hostile & full of myself. I guess the way to balance that is to build up someone else.

Blogger buddy, Emily, is hosting a little competition over at her blog called "Work It Wednesday". Show off you kid strutting their fiercest ensembles & sass, & you just might win a prize. Jokingly I asked if I could enter Natalie & her response was:

Sure! Work It Wednesday does not discriminate, I'm sure you feel like your pup is your "kid" so let the workin' begin!

If that's not the sweetest bit of validation for my neurotic puppy-momma tendencies you've ever heard, I don't know what is! So folks, karmic energies are restored & you just got something fun to do. Start rooting through those photos & I'll see you over there!

Camera Abuse

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to say goodbye to my camera. Now I'm going to beat the crap out of it.
Last week out of nowhere my camera suddenly decided to have a "lens error" that would keep the camera from opening. Nothing happened, it wasn't dropped, it was all very sudden & unexpected. Ever since I taught myself to change my own headlights & taillights from youtube I've been feeling more empowered to figure things out for myself, so I asked Lord Google what I should do about my camera & the answer was "beat it".

Apparently the lens error is super common in this make of camera but it's not recognized by the manufacturer as a defect so it would basically cost more than it's worth to fix it. So the best suggestion is to bang it against something hard & hope to jiggle loose whatever's wrong. I found this forum discussion on whole matter where someone was having a similar rant to my own... but what was really intriguing were the responses.

Note: We have had so many success stories from the “smacking the crap out of your camera complaint/solution” we decided to put up a donate button to funnel some cash to the author of the complaint. If you fixed your camera by reading this complaint, donate and buy this guy a beer.

haha I guess if there's no other hope for my camera, I've got nothing to lose! So I've been having a grand ol' time knocking the crap out of my camera, shaking, prodding at it... I may have crossed the line when I started throwing it across the room & gave it to a friend to disassemble. Meh. If it wasn't dead before, it sure is now. I guess it comes at a good time though, Black Friday & all. But if nothing else at least you know why there haven't been any pretty pictures of friends of adventures lately. R.I.P. Camera

Lunch Break Clarity

Today at lunch I had a glimpse of where my life's choices have lead & the person I'll never get the chance to be.

Let me back up... lunch time doesn't always yield such contemplation... I just wanted to pick up a cupcake for my "Secret Pal"s birthday. You've played the secret pal game at work or summer camp or something before, right? Names are exchanged & you buy this person nice little things to brighten their day without telling them who it's from. For the record, my Secret Pal is a deadbeat. I'm a WAY better Pal than mine is... nobody chews Bubbelicious past the age of 13. But that's not the point. I needed a cupcake.

So I headed down to Dozen (for you non-Pittsburghers it's the super cute & way hipster cupcake bakery local chain) & figured I'd stay for lunch while I was already out. It was a LOVELY lunch break. Me & a "thanksgiving sandwich", reading my book with a chocolate/coconut cupcake of my own, bunches of thistles & grass as centerpieces... just adorable. And I was feeling very cool. Cool enough to snap a picture & brag about my little lunch date with myself.

There was a group of girls next to me, 3 of them, & they were the most adorable group I think I've ever seen. Every one of them had something pierced on their face, wore at least one cozy item like a knit hat or scarf, and NOT ONE OF THEM wore ANY makeup. I was in total awe of them. So much so that I actually considered snapping a picture on the sly... luckily my camera batteries died & took away that option, it was a bad idea anyway. Who were these girls who can afford the trendy lunch spots yet seemingly have Monday afternoons free for girl-talk & nose-piercing?

They are the people I'll never be... not because I don't have the ability, but because I'm living in the life choices I've already made. I can't make ends meet as a freelance photographer or selling 4 etsy items a month... I went to college & have loans to pay, I needed a car to work then had to work to pay my car, I'm a professional & can't pierce just anything I like. It's silly that it's taken me 26 year to realize the difference between "you can be anything" & hoping to be EVERYthing.

I'll never get to be the girl with cotton candy pink hair. Maybe not even a girl with a monroe like I've always always wanted. But I think it's OK to realize these things & take a minute to almost mourn them. To be ok with the fact that I'm just not them. But then again, those girls won't be everything either. Maybe they live with millions of roommates & need girls lunches just to escape? Maybe they have 7 rabbits & can never leave them to go on trips? Maybe they've never had a Secret Pal in their WHOLE LIFE, wouldn't that be a shame?

We're Not Sluts

Clearly, we like to party. You wouldn't stand if front of the sign if you didn't mean it, right? But to yell "Sluts!" at us from your car window? Tsk tsk tsk... Where's the love?

It's something so silly but as my girls & I were walking back to our car this weekend, transitioning from a game night to late-night-munchies to an even later night art gallery exhibit, some guy leaning out his window to call us sluts set us all back. There was this awkward pause where we all looked at eachother & said the likes of "Hey, we're not sluts. Do we look like sluts? I thought we looked nice." And we DID look nice.

It just goes to show that people still make snap-decisions just by glancing at a person. Yes, we were in the notorious party neighborhood, we were dressed up to go out, we were in heels... but we're also 2 married ladies & a churchy-lady... not sluts.

We all do it. In that same night my own friends were making jokes that if we were "x" lbs. lighter & "y" inches taller we'd be awesome super models... we'd just need to lower our IQ by "z" points. Hey wait, why would we automatically assume that these women are stupid? And when I showed up with college friends & said we'd be leaving early to "go to the Warhol & then probably get our drink on" it got translated to get sloppy-hammered at the club. Not what we meant. I kind of wonder if it was a dude who said that, or maybe if we weren't dressed up, if the same assumptions would be made.

So where am I going with all this? Well... I don't know, really. I just think we need to be nicer to eachother. Try not to assume the worst in people based on their looks. And especially women... let's not be so harsh on other women, I see that more than anything. Again, where's the love? Because, hey... we're not sluts.

Cat-Call Worthy

Alternate Title: Sexy Manifesto

I believe that from time to time you just need a night when you can look in the mirror & think "damn I look good". I believe it's a woman's right to be sexy... not to attract or impress anyone, just to give honor to that side of you. I believe that there is a time & a place for smokey eye makeup.  I believe that time is anytime, even if there's nowhere special to go. I believe you don't need a reason to feel good about looking good.

The other night I went out with friends for a celebration. The truth about how this started is that I hadn't showered, didn't WANT to shower, so instead I looked at my I've-seen-better-days hair & said "let's go with this". I added product to make even more of a bed-head mess, & then went on to charcoal eyeshadows. And it felt GOOD.

Then something strange happened. I felt awkward about uploading photos from that night... like I was embarrassed to post photos that say "Hey look at me, I'm hot". I'm not conceited, Lord knows I'm way to self-conscious to cross that line, but I should be allowed to feel good about looking good. So I will.

New Office 360

One of the silver linings to a turbulent beginning of the school year is the fact that I got to move into a new office! It has doors & windows, I've never had either of those before! And my old office has transformed into a workshop for my interns where they each have their own personal desk. Isn't that cute?I think a fresh start was exactly what I needed.

Would you like a tour?







And then there's this wall... The one that needs a little help...



The Colbert portrait is a must... but what do I do with the rest of it? And I don't have enough books for a full book case, so what else should I put on these shelves? Since my decor is already quirky with palm trees & peacock feathers, I feel like it's a fine line to cross over into just weird. Clutter of decorations would just push it over that line faster.

So what could go on this wall that completes the look of young, chic, free-spirited, & warm but still says "I'm a professional, damn it!"? Please give advice, folks!